Re: Critique Thread

by daemongirl Fri Sep 07, 2012 3:15 am

While I don't have a particular character or thread I would like help with, I would like any thoughts people have on my rping in general, what I do well and what I need to improve on. I think the thing I have the most trouble with is the more complicated submission holds and writing those out.

by Bluemouse Fri Sep 07, 2012 3:39 am

Yeah, that doesn't get much easier. Grappling is a bitch. That's why Cassie gets no love from me in matches. I don't think anyone on this site has a working knowledge of jujitsu (that I know of). I learned my lesson hard with her.

by Harrier Mon Oct 22, 2012 9:29 am

Maybe it's not really fitting, but I have a question about how to book rivalries. In short, how do you do it? I mean you have to pay dues and reasonably put people over in Wrestling when you're new or have not found something that really draws interest, that's a tradition I believe in. So I have difficulties with the booking of equal rivals when one of the rivals enters much later than the other and puts people over to pay her dues.

All I normaly come up with is the escalation of danger level, like Vegeta - Freeza - Cell -Boo. Whatever the veteran has overcome in the past, you are the next obstacle that comes at her from the past and grows with her if the rivalry is fitting. Downside of this is that you have to pretend that the new girl has either an exceptionally high learning curve and catches up fast with the veterans, the veteran is lazy and loosing her edge or the rookie realizes that she is not as good as she thought and starts from the bottom again, effectively killing the rivalry for some time.

@daemongirl
I like the way you play. I would not have the energy to constantly play characters the way you do. Most of the posts I read from you give me the expression that a train without brakes is about to hit the train station in a few minutes and the railroad company is desperately trying to derail it to a less used trail.
And with the moves, that's no big problem at all. I really can't tell the difference between a sidewalk slam and an Alabama slam. Or how lethal non submission holds are. Or if the Attitude Adjustment or Wasteland are basically just a glorified Back Body Drop or a poor mans front Samoan Drop. It alway stays a firemans carry with a guy getting dropped left, right, front or behind^^

by Tatyina Mon Oct 22, 2012 9:55 am

You know how Sarah Gatt and Akashi became rivals?

They faced each other in their debut match. Simple as that.

Then we rped together a bit. Then they had another match and another.

Like anything good, you cultivate it from the ground up over time.

by daemongirl Mon Oct 22, 2012 10:07 am

[quote="Harrier":3lmimckb]
@daemongirl
I like the way you play. I would not have the energy to constantly play characters the way you do. Most of the posts I read from you give me the expression that a train without brakes is about to hit the train station in a few minutes and the railroad company is desperately trying to derail it to a less used trail.

Oh wow, thats signature worthy right there lol. As for rivals its like Tatyina said, rivalries are made over time by having repeated matches and rps between the two characters.

by Harrier Mon Oct 22, 2012 12:04 pm

It's not really a problem to set it up and maintain it. It's more a problem of credibility for me, at least in the beginning. Maybe I am too much into wrestling to easily overcome this *hotshoted into something when one person involved is not settled enough is bad* type of thinking and it's no real problem at all. <img src=

" title="Wink" />

by Kitten Mon Oct 22, 2012 2:10 pm

Use a training sequence... it helped Rocky, Daniel Larusso and countless others before you!... it can help you too...

You need some lame 80s music

Here...use this... it is chessy enough

[youtube=425,350:j425a5b8]hIrlry2gSQQ[/youtube:j425a5b8]

Edit: Or my personal favorite

[youtube=425,350:j425a5b8]77M9ydPriwg&feature=fvwrel[/youtube:j425a5b8]

Edit 2: Forget it. I am using that as Natalia's victory song

by Bluemouse Mon Oct 22, 2012 11:17 pm

That's my very favoritest Spongebob episode.

by jakeb1993 Wed Dec 19, 2012 8:37 pm

Hello Guys and Gals,

As some of you may know i have been sort of dropping off the radar randomly these past few months. The reason for this is because i have been going away to try and improve my writing. I would be really happy if you guys could give me criticism on my writing.

I mean constructive critcism. Now just harsh comments saying i am rubbish or have no knowledge. I know doing this is leaving myself open to all kinds of abuse but hopefully you will be mature enough to refrain and just be helpful.

Many thanks in advance <img src=

" title="Smile" />

by Tatyina Thu Dec 20, 2012 7:58 am

Merged your post to the critique thread.

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Improvement/Critique Thread