Winds Of Change

Suzumi opened her eyes and realized she was laying on her back. The spar was over and she was sure she had just been on the losing end. She passed out. She couldn't escape the hold. She didn't have the strength to power out, the speed to get herself away from the nasty position or the technical know-how to work her way out once she was locked in.

"I gave everything I had, and ya got me in two moves. I'm not sure if you've gotten that good, or I'm that bad. Mayne both." Suzumi said out loud, speaking to herself as much as she did Mikoto. "....You think I've lost so much that I should walk away don't you? I'm not good enough for the big leagues, and you guys all think I'm washed up. Well.. its like, not so easy to walk away from the only thing you have ever done that you cared about, and were any good at!" Suzumi said, much more loudly. It wasn't anger in her voice as much as it was frustration, disbelief, and a hint of resignation.

Suzumi had to ask the question, but she was terrified to hear the answer. She was just beaten badly in the spar and the humiliation was still fresh. Suzumi's heart would be crushed if Mikoto ended up saying something to the effect of Suzumi calling it quits.

The relief washed over Mikoto once she witnessed her bloodied friend arouse from her slumber and start speaking up. She breathed out a sigh of exhaustion after letting Suzu's legs fall down to the canvas, the comfort of knowing her friend was cognizant meant that she could now allow herself the luxury of coping with the aching discomfort and pain their spar had put her through. The priestess leaned back and propped herself up on her outstretched arms as she allowed Suzu all the time in the world to say her peace. She looked down and away for a few seconds to think on her response before turning back to her fallen comrade.

"...Suzu...you need...to stop...defeating yourself!!" Miko abruptly shouted in a startling departure from her normally reserved tone, twisting herself to the side and steadily rising back up to her feet as she continued her impassioned retort. "You...you wallow in this...this mire of self pity and doubt...projecting all of your own fears on to other people!! It's all in your mind!! Your leg has never been better, but if you keep setting yourself up to fail like this, then...then maybe you should take a break from-!!..." Miko stopped herself mid-sentence to pinch her nose and settle herself down, now speaking at a lower decibel. Her own heightened emotions were clouding her judgment. She willed herself to calm down before she said something she couldn't take back. "We ALL only want what's best for you, Suzu...even Chris does..."

Suzumi looked right at Mikoto with eyes glassed over by forming tears. Mikoto's words, while essentially true managed to cut through Suzumi like a dagger. "You would like that wouldn't ya? Tell you what, if I am defeating myself how about you make me go away? Like, I can see it now... Former student schools teacher to come out on top!" Suzumi said as she held her hands up over her head, spreading them out to illustrate a big news headline. "Lets have a match, and if you win you get to show the world that me beating you before was a total fluke. You will have surpassed anything I ever was and the broken down pity party teacher will fade away into the shadows to figure out what to do with he rest of her life." Suzumi said coldly before brushing past Mikoto to go change.

Suzumi didn't say another word, she felt hurt and she also had a strange feeling in her gut. Anxiety? That could have been it. But Suzumi felt like she had been lying to herself since she came to the AFW in a way. Was what Mikoto said true? All Suzumi knew was that she wanted to set out to show everyone that she was back for good.... unless Mikoto did win, and should have won the first go-round. Then, Suzumi didn't know if she could swallow her pride enough to ever show her face around here again.